The loss of a beloved animal-friend can bring up many difficult emotions for an individual, children or the whole family. It isn't easy to say goodbye, and it can be especially difficult if the circumstances are sudden. We've come up with a list of ways to help you cope with this loss, whether it's for yourself or to guide someone younger through this new side of life.
1. Be kind to yourself.
There is no script to grieving. Oftentimes, people expect themselves to mourn in one way or another. In reality, an abnormal reaction to an abnormal situation is normal. People have spent years alongside their beloved pets, often through different homes, phases of life and even countries. It is not uncommon that your cat or dog has seen more of you than your best friends!
So, the most important thing is to be kind to yourself. Sadness can come in many forms, and comes up at unexpected times. Maybe your house seems different, quieter. Maybe it's not even the absence of the barking or mewing, but the absence of the jangling collar. The only way to understand what's happening inside your heart is to quiet the self-criticizing voices and accept yourself, and your emotions, as they come.
2. Speak!
Most people are hesitant to speak their emotions. Whether they grew up in a world that didn't permit them speech or they simply don't feel like they're "open book" types, remember that we all hold things in, and holding things in can hurt you. It might seem obvious, but don't forget to tell friends, "I miss my pet." It can explain a lot!
3. Don't move on too quickly.
Some people might rush to the pound and come home with another dog, or two! This is a natural instinct –– you've lost something and want it back. But dogs aren't commodities, they are friends, lifelong companions. They can't come to as easily as a purchase. Don't rush into a new commitment before taking the time to ask yourself, "Why did I love my pet so much? What did they bring into my life?"
When you understand that a new pet might bring something different –– we all know our cats and dogs have so many personalities! –– it's time to start considering another animal. But don't always give in to that immediate instinct. It can hurt you in the long run.
4. Go outside.
For a lot of us, whether we're in New York City or rural Pennsylvania, pets are our connection to the outdoors. They're a lifeline to this beautiful planet we call home. Walking the dog becomes not just a domestic ritual, but a reminder to get outside and experience all the sounds and smells.
If you've lost a pet, you might find yourself inside more. You don't have that constant reason to go outside for a walk. It's important to make that time happen for yourself. When you're outside, remember how much joy it brought your dog to explore their slice of the world, and how eager they were to show you how much they loved spending time in the fresh air every day.
5. Join the Black Paw community.
Have you had a hard time mourning the loss of a pet? So have we. It's why we created the Black Paw Memorial Pin, a simple sign to say to the world, "I miss my pet." It's a sign of grieving and renewal, to show you might need a little extra kindness in these tough days –– but it's also a display of hope, that you know you're part of a larger, loving community.